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Scrivel.com, Funnier than reading the obituaries. - F. Lawrence Caslin |
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Mimzie Beaumont | MIMZIE BEAUMONT grew up in the Deep South, feverishly plotting her departure from the first moment of conscious thought. She has been happily living in New York for many years now, wearing flip flops in the dead of winter, to the horror of those who love her, and blithely wreaking indiscriminant havoc in a once safe and civilized state. Beaumont is a chameleon of sorts. In college she wanted to be an actress until she realized that she would probably have to wait tables until she got her big break. Then she decided she would be an artist and tried that for awhile. Her work can be found at www.318x.com. Once she realized that painting wasn’t going to pay the bills, she decided to try writing. So far, so good. Mimzie doesn’t hold anything back, she doesn’t sugar coat anything and, most importantly, she doesn’t care if it offends you. She is most definitely an Equal Opportunity Offender. You can contact Mimzie, if you're up for the challenge, by either smoke signals or at mimziesmuzings@yahoo.com. Or you can visit her blog here: Mimzie's Muzings
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Written by Mimzie Beaumont
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Tuesday, 06 May 2008 |
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 There are very few people in the world who are able to do exactly what they want as far as careers are concerned. When I was little I wanted to be a model. Once I realized that I wasn’t pretty enough, I decided that I wanted to be a fashion designer. Then when I was a senior in high school I was in the school play and got a taste of acting. It was then that I decided that I wanted to be an actor. Of course, in-between all of these aspirations were OTHER aspirations, like: an oceanographer, a lawyer, an artist, a writer – really I could go on and on. |
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Written by Mimzie Beaumont
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Tuesday, 29 April 2008 |
 When I was much younger I had a huge crush on Burt Reynolds. I don’t remember a lot of the details as I was, again, much younger. I had a poster of him on the back of my bedroom door in which he had on a pair of super tight jeans and a shirt that he had completely unbuttoned, so as to show off his extremely hairy chest. My memories of being this young are rather blurry except for that poster and bedtime every night. |
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Written by Mimzie Beaumont
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Friday, 11 April 2008 |
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 My Mother has claimed to have ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) for years now. She would tell me how she would start a project and before completion, her mind would wander and the project would lie untouched, unfinished for days, weeks, forever. I never could understand why she, and so many other people, instantly jump to ADD. Hasn’t anyone ever heard of good, old fashioned boredom? It’s part of the reason, lack of time being the other reason, why we don’t sit and read an entire book in one afternoon. Everyone needs a break at some point!
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Written by Mimzie Beaumont
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Friday, 04 April 2008 |
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 My mother’s middle name is Victoria. My middle name is Victoria. When and if I have a daughter – from my mouth to God’s ear - I want to name her Isabella Victoria. It’s a nice, normal name but still not a common name. If you already have kids, did you have a hard time thinking of a name? If you don’t have kids yet, do you already have a name picked out and ready for when and if you do have kids? I realize it’s more of a girl thing, but work with me here.
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Written by Mimzie Beaumont
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Thursday, 27 March 2008 |
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 How The First Grade Scarred Me For Life.
Last night, while watching a little kid hit his dad in the “twig and berries” instead of a piñata, on America’s Funniest Home Videos, I suddenly had what some might call a childhood memory. I call it one of many horrible childhood flashbacks.
My first grade teacher was a bitch. I was actually happy when, as an adult, I had heard she died. She does, I’m quite sure, currently reside in Hell, thus making me feel quite sorry for Satan himself. |
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Written by Mimzie Beaumont
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Thursday, 20 March 2008 |
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 Have you ever been asked the question, “if you could be any animal in the world, what animal would you be?” It’s one of those dumb questions that always seem to pop up when trying to get to know someone. I think the better question would be “what animal are you most like?” Because if you’re asking me what animal I want to BE like, I would say a tiger. Why? Because they are predators and if they want something, they take it. End of story. I can understand that. |
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