Matt D works as an engineer in a small town in Idaho. Oddly enough, he is not considered the funniest engineer in his group as most jokes include a “binary reference” and he doesn’t understand them. He cheated his way through college. He married a girl at least twice as hot as him, and they obviously skipped class when learning about birth control in high school, as they have 4 beautiful children. Matt likes watching movies and TV shows that include “long walks on the beach” because he does not have enough time to do this himself. His hobbies include, emptying the dishwasher, mowing the lawn, and avoiding the neighbors and other acquaintances he sees at the grocery store. If watching sports were a paid profession, he would be a jillionaire. He also recently placed himself up for adoption in hopes that a rich hotel owner will adopt him, thus leading to a new career as a socialite. No word on if he’s planning on letting a video “leak out” to the press after this. More can be found at his blog, “That Tears it….!” (http://thefourthring.blogspot.com)
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Written by Matt D
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Monday, 25 August 2008 |
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 As a last hurrah to the summer before my kids headed back to school, we decided to have a little "camp-out" in the backyard. The kids were totally excited, which helped me overcome any apprehension at the lack of sleep that I would receive. To mix things up a little, we decided to park it on the trampoline instead of a tent.
This would be the first of many mistakes that led to a sleepless night. (for me...not them) I'd like to give a few tips for those over-exuberant dads that may get a wild hair, and choose to have a little overnighter in their backyard. |
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Written by Matt D
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Tuesday, 12 August 2008 |
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 On a recent trip, I visited the "Magic Kingdom" in Anaheim. Unfortunately, one of the only impressive "magic" tricks I saw, was the ease at which they took large sums of my money.
Really the only other “sleight of hand” that I witnessed was the difference at how Disneyland treated the “Americans with disabilities Act." Let me explain:
Most attractions actually have 3 different lines. 1 is for the foreigners where they just walk up and wait for an hour until they reach a sign that says "45 minutes from this point." |
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Written by Matt D
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Friday, 25 July 2008 |
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 In the past few years, the media has brought to the fore-front of discussion, the idea of an "evolutionary step" in the chain of humanity. This "step" has led to everyday people displaying physical and mental attributes like none could have dreamed. Shows like "Heroes" and movies like "X-Men" have people wondering…what if? (I on the other hand, wondered "what if" that blue makeup were to be smeared off Rebecca Romijn…I digress)
At great risk to myself and my family, I believe it's time to come out of the closet. (no…not that) I have decided to tell the world that like Hugh Jackman, I have a super-power. But unlike Hugh Jackman, I do not look good without a shirt. |
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Written by Matt D
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Wednesday, 16 July 2008 |
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 These smarty-pants scientists have got this whole "global warming" thing figured out, don't they? Ok…whatever…but there are far more important questions in my mind that need to be explored scientists and experts in their fields.
I just read that they now think that second-hand cigarette smoke is not dangerous? My 4th grade teacher Mrs. Jansen would disagree. I still remember the demonstration where she took a cigarette and dis-colored the white sponge from the smoke. If the sponge is brown, you have cancer. I am scared of brown sponges to this day. |
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