I like to think of myself as a pretty charitable person. In fact everyone I know thinks I'm a pretty charitable person as well; but that could be because I tell them why I'm a pretty charitable person. I try to be genuinely charitable - giving purely for the good of giving, a completely selfless act - but I can't. I need to tell someone about it. 

I don't reckon I'm alone either. Whenever someone hands over a bit of loose change to the homeless, or writes a cheque to the local orphanage, they all want a bit of recognition, a pat on the back from someone. It's not a bad thing - it's just part of the human condition. People can't brag about the things they normally do (cheating, lying, stealing, feeling up their cousin, etc.) so when they do something that they know is worth some praise they make damn sure everyone knows about it. Why else would donations to charities be given in ludicrously large cheques?

I give to charity and believe me you're not the first people who know about it. Being a student, I don't have a lot of money to give, but I try and do my bit…

What a great guy? If only more people were like him…I wonder if he's single?

Please, please…let me continue. Anyway as I was saying, I started my first account with a charity about a year ago. I don't normally fall for those adverts drenched in emotional blackmail but it just so happens that I was incredibly hung-over, ashamed that I pissed the best part of fifty quid down an alleyway the night before. The guilt hit me when I realised that for about one beer and two tequila slammers a month I could give little Kantigi and his family fresh, clean water and a brand spanking new goat.

It soon gave me a taste for charity; saving little Kantigi's life got me a lot of plus points with my family and friends. On the look out for other good deeds I realised that charity really does begin at home (well the cardboard box just outside your home). Giving to the homeless was the easiest and most effective way of highlighting your saint-like qualities because others saw the whole story from beginning to end:

·    The person that is down on their luck (and down on toiletries)
·    The good Samaritan stopping for the poor fellow
·    The giving of coins and a few encouraging words
·    The jubilant gratification of the receiver
·    The modesty of the giver
·    The beam of light breaking through the clouds and shining on the giver whilst harps play in the background and children get up out of their wheelchairs all over the world.

Its all there to behold and takes less than a minute and, I've learnt if you have a lot of change but in small denominations, only costs about 20 pence a time; it's totally worth it. People say they get a nice warm feeling when they give to someone less fortunate than themselves but in reality the warm feeling is from knowing that you appear to be a better person than all the others that ignored the dirty scrounger.

Jesus was the biggest culprit for this; sure he was a charitable guy but it's not like he kept it to himself, and he certainly didn't discourage the Bible - not exactly modest if you ask me.

---

Comments

Add New Search RSS

Write comment
Name:
Title:

Powered by JoomlaCommentCopyright (C) 2006 Frantisek Hliva. All rights reserved.Homepage: http://cavo.co.nr/