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My Kid Is Going To Kick Your Kid's Ass |
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Written by Mimzie Beaumont
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Saturday, 05 April 2008 |
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  My mother’s middle name is Victoria. My middle name is Victoria. When and if I have a daughter – from my mouth to God’s ear - I want to name her Isabella Victoria. It’s a nice, normal name but still not a common name. If you already have kids, did you have a hard time thinking of a name? If you don’t have kids yet, do you already have a name picked out and ready for when and if you do have kids? I realize it’s more of a girl thing, but work with me here.
 Would you check with a Social Security database to see if the name you liked was too trendy? Would you spend $475 to have a numerologist test your favorite name to see if it has positive associations? Would you hire a professional baby-name consultant to use a mathematical formula? None of these appeal to you?
Ok, I have more. How about for $35 you can go to a baby naming service and they will give you 12 names to pick from? Would you be more interested in a half hour phone consultation for the price of $95? Or you could always upgrade that package to the package where you get 3 half hour phone consultations and then, once you pick a name, you will get a personalized manual describing the name’s history, linguistic origin and personality traits. And quite frankly, at $350, it’s a steal. I’ve had it with the all the crap baby names out there. In June of last year, the Wall Street Journal ran a story about all of the above nonsense for finding the perfect baby name. It mentioned one nervous mom-to-be from Illinois who listed her 16 favorite names on a tournament bracket and asked friends, family and people she met at baby showers to fill it out. The winner: Anna Irene. Anna Irene? ANNA IRENE? She needed help coming up with that crap? You know what? I give up. |
Mimzie Beaumont
